Beauty Hunters

What it means to be siblings.

Dear M & B,

What does it mean to be siblings? To grow up together. To share the same parents. To live under the same roof. To share so much of the same experiences.

Can you comprehend how profound it is to bear witness, up close and personal, to the unfolding of each other’s life. To have a front row seat to the storms that batter and the sunny days that bring welcomed feelings of safety and peace.

What does it mean to be that person for each other? Pause and think about it for a minute. Drop into your heart and rest in that question, in the possibility.

When I was little growing up with my sister, I never gave much thought to our relationship. She was just there, part of the family, as was I. We were quite typical I imagine. We fought, we played, we cohabitated, we just were sisters.

And as the years progressed, we grew apart.

Today, as you know, I do not have a relationship with my sister. You, as a casualty to her and my broken relationship, do not have a relationship with your only Aunt.

Many years ago, in my sister’s and my youth, the fissures began. Without attending to the accumulated resentments, the hurts, the fractures in our relationship evolved into a full on break. You have watched me try hard over the years to address, to tend, to try to mend the relationship.

I wish our parents had spoken with my sister and me, coaching us, teaching us how important it is to take care of our relationship. I would like to believe that perhaps we would be in a very different place than where we are today.

However, you will continue to hear me say, that I believe the hardest struggles in our life is from where our greatest gifts to the world are born.

To that end, please allow me to share one of the many invaluable lessons I have learned from my birth family struggles.

Your relationship with each other is sacred. Let me say that again.
Your relationship with each other is SACRED.

You will take each other for granted. It is what we humans seem to do - move through life on auto pilot oblivious to the tapestry of wonder, magic and beauty all around. I want to encourage us to not!

Let’s practice living intentionally. Let’s practice being aware daily of all that we have to be grateful for. Starting with each other.

No matter what we may be facing, let’s be beauty hunters as Jennifer Pastiloff teaches.

And the beauty I want to celebrate, to shine a spot light on, to be in the forefront of your heart and mind, is the sibling relationship you two share with each other. Please hold it in the highest regard.

That is to say…

• I pray you recognize how lucky you are to walk through life together by each other’s side…to understand each other’s life experiences in only the way a sibling can because you originated from the same place and treked forward in tandem.

• I pray you value and honor each other and the sacred nature of your sibling relationship.

• Be each other’s cheerleader, lifting up. Your words and deeds have an impact.

• Protect and stand by each other, keeping a watchful eye out.

• Be eager to learn from each other. You both have so much to exchange.

• Be honest always with one another.

• Pass the talking stick, listening and speaking with an open heart, resolving whatever may arise - as it will arise.

You are love and you are loved!

Love each other!

Your biggest fan, always and forever,

Maman

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I want to thank Annie Spratt for the beautiful photography.