The Power Of One...

United becomes a movement.

Dear Friends,

I have been thinking a lot over the last few weeks about what my 8 and 12 year old children have heard, and what they may or may not understand about the mind-bending, heart-wrenching tragedy in Israel and Palestine. We don’t have the news on at home, nor do my children have phones, tablets or social media. However, they do not live under a rock. They are hearing bits at school from friends, as well as thoughtful perspectives from teachers and staff, such as this from my daughter’s Head of School…

“Compassion, respect, and the celebration of human dignity are core aspects of the value system that we teach and believe in. We respect each other’s differences and we engage in mindful dialogue around them without judgment. Even in times of conflict, I know that we will continue to seek more understanding and that we will be there for each other.”

 I am so grateful for the sensitive, inclusive and sympathetic guidance my children see modeled and are taught to engage in at their schools.

They have also heard bits from their father and me at home. However, we have not had what feels to me as a sufficiently thoughtful narration and conversation with our children. I also know that the research shows the most important people with whom children need to talk about difficult topics, is at home with their primary caregivers.

The following letter spawned from that knowledge, plus my desire to help my son and daughter process the situation, while instilling in them hope for a genuinely positive resolution and understanding of the agency each of us have to create a better world and future for all.

Ultimately when I finished writing the letter and I read it back to myself, I realized I had in fact written the letter to me, for me, by me. It’s the narration and promise of hope I need in this moment.

Additionally, I remind myself that in times of darkness, we must especially find and exalt joy. For ourselves, for our children and for the world’s children. Joy is the light that extinguishes the darkness.

How? Why?

As a mother, to my children AND to myself, I believe it is my job, honor and privilege to protect our psyche, energy, sacredness and capacity to alchemize, especially in the hardest of times. One of the ways I do this is by embracing joy instead of shying away from it, exemplifying that good prevails always. I tease out joy throughout our day, creating space for feelings of hope, wellbeing, centeredness, safety, and agency. From this place of fortitude we have greater capacity to get active in positive ways such as reaching out to our friends who are impacted, donating resources, listening and learning.

Or as Maria Popova sees joy in the face of darkness…

“In a world pocked by cynicism and pummeled by devastating news, to find joy for oneself and spark it in others, to find hope for oneself and spark it in others, is nothing less than a countercultural act of courage and resistance. This is not a matter of denying reality — it is a matter of discovering a parallel reality where joy and hope are equally valid ways of being.”

With that, I am sending to all, love, hope and prayers for peace and joy, xoxo,

WRW

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My Dearest Children,

My Dearest Self,

In too many ways our world is hurting. Which is to say we, human kind, are in pain and we are suffering for it.

I have taught you that our external behavior mirrors our internal feelings.

I wish as your mother, as part of the collective motherhood, that I could literally wipe away the pain and suffering that is all around us. The sons and daughters, once beloved infants, who have found themselves enduring all kinds of conditions and destituteness, atrocities and injustices, I wish I could wipe away their agony.

October 7th, 2023, a date that will be imprinted into the contemporary global consciousness and then the arc of history, similarly to 9/11, we learned of Israeli women, children and men, of all ages, unarmed and without clear warning, being attacked, tortured, kidnapped and killed by Hamas militants. Unspeakable terrorism unfolded and acts of evil so inhumane, it is hard to fathom how … how can any human being carry out such cruel, cruel acts? No rules of engagement, no laws of war. Just pure unadulterated acts of evil.

“When enemies differ greatly because of different religious beliefs, race, or language,
and as such they see each other as “less than human”, war conventions are rarely applied.” ~ Just War Theory

In response, the Israeli government has promised annihilation of their aggressors.

Lives of many, many more innocent civilians, who, like you and me, love and are loved, have hopes and dreams, purposes to fulfill, a beating heart who are generally just doing their best to be decent people living their lives for and with their loved ones, may be devastatingly cut short. Many are already suffering the casualties of war such as a lack of food, water, medical attention, energy and shelter. Palestinian and Israeli families, neighborhoods, communities stand to be wiped out. Some already have.

I write to you, my dearest children, to hold you, to soothe you, to unite with you — for me too. I can easily allow myself to succumb to my feelings of loss - loss for life and loss of my bearings in this raging, thrashing ocean of violence.

But no. I, and the collective “we”, must process, alchemize and ultimately be part of the solution. We must believe that we can, individually and as a group, do better, be better. I believe we can.

I am encouraged when I remember how significantly a single person can change, shift, catalyze the course of history.

Aristotle and the great philosophers, Jesus and the great religious figures, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and the great activists, Amelia Earhart and the great inventors, Mahatma Gandhi and the great pacifists, Steve Jobs and the great innovators, to name a handful who have left their indelible mark on the world which we literally have benefited from in our very own lives.

And so I encourage us to remember during the black, opaque periods such as now, that each of us can and does make a difference.

Mantra:
“I am a co-creator of a peaceful world, beginning within myself. I nurture serenity in my heart, radiate kindness in my actions, and sow the seeds of compassion, knowing that the world transforms as I do, one peaceful step at a time.” ~ Julie-Anne Lee, CEC

I am someone who takes time to process important or complex matters. I turn inward, get quiet and contemplative. I am also someone who makes decisions swiftly.

These characteristics may seem at odds, however, they peacefully coexist within me. Yin and Yang. My decision making is intuitive based on all the inputs that I have received over my lifetime including my research, experiences, values and beliefs. My method of processing derives from my upbringing being complex and my resulting knowledge that there are many factors at play which makes the landscape neither “black or white”, “cut or dry”, but rather “yes, and … ”.

Here are a few simple thoughts for us to build upon in our commitment to be part of the change we wish to see in the world around us:

• Answers and transformation lie in love and faith, not hate nor fear. They lie in our commitment to wanting to listen with an open heart and a curious mind and a desire to mutually understand, make repairs and find forgiveness.

• In Democracies we must encourage exceptional people to run for elected office and support them with our votes. People who are highly evolved in their capacity to fairly problem solve for all constituents. Independent thinkers with unwavering integrity and humanity.

• Feeling safe, being safe and living in safety as well as having our basic needs such as food and shelter met, as Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs put forth, are fundamental to people effectively problem solving, starting from a place of generosity of spirit towards others including those whom we perceive we have more differences than similarities.

• We all deserve, as our birthright, to be treated with dignity and so too, we must treat all whom we encounter with the same dignity they deserve.

• As I mentioned earlier, situations are oftentimes complex, since our feelings and perspectives are unique and nuanced based upon our individual life experiences and those of the collective who raised us. Consequently, we must bring a desire to grasp the subtleties, to hold the dialectic of two different points of view, to lean into compassion and stand in our humbleness.

“A mature person is one who does not think only in absolutes, who is able to be objective even when deeply stirred emotionally, who has learned that there is both good and bad in all people and in all things, and who walks humbly and deals charitably with the circumstances of life, knowing that in this world no one is all knowing and therefore all of us need both love and charity.” ~ Eleanor Roosevelt in It Seems to Me: Selected Letters

• Let us do our research, using multiple sound sources, to understand context, history and perspectives, realizing it is a starting point from which we can gain knowledge, not decree a final judgement. Unless we have walked in another’s shoes, we will never full comprehend their experience, but we can try to understand and sympathize as best we can.

• The power of one, when united with others, aligned towards a common goal, has the ability and momentum to create massive social change. It is the only thing that truly ever has.

You are love and you are loved. We can do hard things. But we first must believe we can.

xoxo, Maman