Shedding The Old, Embracing The New
The beauty of intentional living.
Dear Friends,
Buongiorno! Greetings from Taormina, Sicily!
Over the next handful of weeks while traveling, my publishing schedule will be irregular. Please forgive me for publishing off schedule. I do, however, hope you will come join me in the chat where I am popping in and out more regularly sharing snippets from my travels.
For this week’s Little Black Book I am highlighting two tried and true loves and one new treasure. I hope you enjoy.
I absolutely love Nili Lotan’s Shon jeans. They have long been a staple of mine because they effortlessly pull together a look in a jiffy. Ballet flats, a French tucked t-shirt, blouse or sweater with Shon jeans and voila, chic cool girl vibe! The darted knees that create the curved silhouette of the legs which crop at the ankle bone are also perfect for running around town comfortably and with ease.
The Canoe Chair by Éric Schmitt is a super special piece that I wish you all could see in person. The body is constructed of steel that is then lacquered to a glossy shine, accompanied by accents of polished brass, most notably the canoe shaped sculptural armrests. “My work is a combination of the sculptor I almost am, the architect that I have always aspired to be and the designer that I am not exactly.” This is how Éric Schmitt describes himself. However, he is too humble. His work speaks of the brilliant sculptor, architect, and designer he is.
Atomic Habits by James Clear is not a newly released book. As a matter of fact, James Clear’s book has sold millions of copies because of his proven technique on how to achieve goals through consistency of what we do daily. That is to say, this book teaches us how to adjust our behavior in order to build unstoppable habits. I am diving deep into shedding some habits I don’t want anymore and creating new ones I need to install in order to be the version of myself I aspire to be. Atomic Habits is my roadmap.
SHEDDING THE OLD, EMBRACING THE NEW: The beauty of intentional living.
Dear Friends,
I am writing this (publishing it a few weeks later) while on a plane to the island of Sardinia, off the coast of Italy. My daughter will turn nine while we are there, at which time my son will be thirteen and a half. Their faces have changed. The baby is gone. Now I see a hint of the young woman my daughter will grow into with her round cherub face adorned by the exotic combination of big, almond shaped brown eyes and thick, yet delicate, wispy eyebrows that ever so slightly touch together above the bridge of her nose. Features she inherited from her Persian ancestors. My son’s peach fuzz ever so slightly filling in above his top lip, the angles of his bronzed colored face more defined, and the musculature of his developing body filling out, all betrayals of the little boy that once was but no longer is. My son firmly transitioned into adolescence.
My son and daughter presiding in the in-between. The in-between of young children once dependent on me for everything but now maturing individuals with their own perspectives, desires, and budding lives.
We all live in the in-between. Who we were and who we are becoming. Where we have been and where we are going.
Hopefully we are always growing, evolving, and spiraling up. Taking in our relationships and the world around us as reflections and nourishment for our growth, inspiring us to lean into our purpose, gifts, and truth. For time stops for no one.
I contemplate…
What are we doing with the time we have? Are we showing up as the person we want to be? Are we living the life we want? Are we fulfilling our dharma?
Or are we stuck? Stagnate? Asleep? Numbing out and avoiding by scrolling, swiping, shopping, making excuses and procrastinating?
We are the series of habits we do repeatedly daily. Both our actions and our thoughts determine the lives we live and the people we are. Do we hit the snooze button when it goes off in the morning after a late night of doom scrolling? Or do we rocket out of bed each morning ready to seize the day after a good night of sleep kicked off by a healthy sleep promoting bedtime routine? What habits have we ingrained in our daily life that are serving us and we want to double down on? And what housekeeping do we need to do, retiring habits that are hijacking our goals?
As we grow, we shed. Shedding what is no longer supporting our growth. Denouncing what is getting in the way of who we want to be and where we want to go. Waging war if we must, to combat what’s hurting us. Our dreams and wellbeing worth fighting for.
I am in the in-between. Even stuck a little, needing a push.
With my children becoming more independent, I find them needing me to be more of their coach and mentor and less of their means for daily survival. With that shift, comes the time and space to breathe, expand, shape shift, and reacquaint with my own needs, dreams, and goals, of which I have many. Life is so precious and brimming with opportunities I want to explore and soak up.
To which I ask you, what dreams do you hold dear, who do you want to be, and what concrete goals can you set your attention to mastering the systems necessary to achieve them?
As Scott Adams, the cartoonist of Dilbert, acutely articulates a key distinction to habit creation, “Goals are about the results we want to achieve. Systems are about the processes that lead to those results.”
A goal is the destination, not the method to reach our destination. This is a critical distinction most of us get wrong. For, we create a goal, or a resolution, yet don’t put in place the actual process, or algorithm, necessary for us to reach it. The results take care of themselves if we take care of mastering our systems.
“Fix the inputs and the outputs will fix themselves.” ~ James Clear, Atomic Habits
To that end, with the tutelage of James Clear’s expertise from his book, I am embarking on the process of creating a series of systems to dial in my daily energy. Specifically, I am focusing on committing to a healthful, science backed bedtime routine, plus getting back into my body via daily opportunities to move. Both of these areas in my life — my sleep and my physical activity — have fallen by the wayside. And I know I am not alone. Many of us, with our busy lives, let our own wellbeing become expendable. And most of us, I would argue, aren’t aware of the nitty gritty, scientifically proven methods to most successfully install the habits necessary to achieve our goals.
As I clarify what my systems look like, based on Clear’s insights, I will share them with you. If you feel inspired, please join me in tweaking them to fit your unique circumstances and let’s together optimize our sleep and activate our energy.
Until next time, I’m thinking of you all and hoping you’re having a great week.
Xoxo ~ WRW
My goal is to keep spending more time with my family as that nourishes my soul!
Great read. Change is always afoot. I’m an older person and am still setting and working toward achieving my goals.